Frankly, these are the best we could find. First date: Hot dog stand. After they buy your hot dog just run away.— Jess [ham] (@thejessbess) June 27, 2014 yo can I get a hotdog "you mean a doghot?" what? "sir it's opposite day" oh ok, yes [neither speak again for 3 minutes] wait, i mean no— k e e t (@KeetPotato) November 7, 2014 "We've reached Final Jeopardy. Our--" Alex, can we start over? I just realized this whole time I was holding a hot dog instead of the buzzer— Ray (@SirEviscerate) October 31, 2014 mortal kombat "finish him" but for when i think i can't finish the third hot dog— Kelgore Trout (@KelgoreTrout) August 3, 2014 My wife bought four giant bottles of ketchup. That’s almost enough for my 2-year-old to eat one hot dog.— Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) December 5, 2014 hot dog cannon &gt; t-shirt gun &gt; fireworks— Lana Berry (@Lana) July 5, 2014 sometimes you just accidentally win a hot dog eating contest.— Beau Hartenstine (@madcaplaughs30) March 17, 2015 reads "Hotdog Eating Contest" sign as "Free Hotdogs"— Meth Lab for Cutie (@kiralc) February 6, 2015 It’s kind of alarming how many times I’ve resolved a parenting crisis by microwaving a hot dog.— Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) May 1, 2014 Saved a couple hot dogs that fell in between the grates of the grill so this must be exactly what doctors feel like when they save a life.— Babies Daddy (@dshack8) August 23, 2014 Note: these tweeters are not affiliated with Applegate. We just think they're hilarious! What's In Your Hot Dog?